T.B's Vogue Ball

Bare feet + plastic shoes = Horrific breeding ground for bacteria

dunno why but thast had me in bits

crocs are for people, who have given up on life

wookie wrote:crocs are for people, who have given up on life

And he has(my bro).

Fandango Widewheels wrote:Bare feet + plastic shoes = Horrific breeding ground for bacteria

Broadhead wrote:

tanit wrote:

crang wrote:My brother still wears 'crocs'

Crocs are officially back. Seriously. I know! It's dead wrong. But it's a fashion fact.

TB, say it ain't so

Fact

T.B wrote:

Broadhead wrote:

tanit wrote:

crang wrote:My brother still wears 'crocs'

Crocs are officially back. Seriously. I know! It's dead wrong. But it's a fashion fact.

TB, say it ain't so

Fact

*dies*

bit dramatic?

He's all about the drama is our Scott

We know, it's a theatre of complicity.

T.B wrote:bit dramatic?

Me? Never!

I have always wondered who it is that decides these fashions. Like when you read that something is the big look this season. How do they all know? Do they discuss it amongst themselves? It's a funny world is the fashion world, isn't it?

I'm way out of my depth with it all but find it very interesting. And ridiculous.

Basically... you don't get it?

Sherrers wrote:Basically... you don't get it?

It's an unhealthy amalgamation of two forum heavyweights. We've created a non-plussed but well dressed monster.

Run for the hills! (in these heels? you must be out of your mind girlfriend)

Broadhead wrote:

T.B wrote:bit dramatic?

Me? Never!

I have always wondered who it is that decides these fashions. Like when you read that something is the big look this season. How do they all know? Do they discuss it amongst themselves? It's a funny world is the fashion world, isn't it?

I'm way out of my depth with it all but find it very interesting. And ridiculous.

I can answer that seriously if you like but I learned it entirely from TB so she should explain.

But it's a combo of 'trendsetters' ...literally eccentrics that get spotted out and about by teams of rip-off experts, Then designers doing 'their own take' on what is reported (ripping off twice) and then it hits the gossip machine.

You know like in Hollywood nothing for decades then 3 modern cowboy films come out? Or 2 films about Truman Capote. Industry internal gossip. 'I heard so-and-so is doing this and have you heard... etc etc'.

Always "next season". Can you imagine... any large industry's R&D is build on secrecy. Industrial espionage is rife. Funnily enough in Fashion it's really hard to keep a secret. No one knows why

Then as next season approaches fear and paranoia set in and everyone starts to conform. It's all about yellow. Yellow? are you sure? No I'm not! Neither am I! ... Yellow it is!
Mark could do a graph. There is a lot of fannying about strangely enough and the closer the deadlines get the more they realise they have no ideas or only have legwarmers made out of ham and sparklers.

And then there are the catty magazines.

Then weirdly there is a huge last minute panic. Industry professionals in a panic?? even after a whole year to work stuff out? Why does that happen?

Basically it's the GAYNESS. There. I dared.



Total lack of discretion, gossip, drama and ironically.... conformity.

How did I do?

I'm treading water as you can probably tell until her majesty delivers

I've got a couple of friends who work in the fashion industry and that is scarily spot on.

One of them is employed to hawk around the sweatshops of the far east and have a nosey at what's going on, then rip off the designs for a well know high street chain.

You did alright smarty pants.

Now stand well back..


Handbags! Handbags at dawn! Handbag House! er saddle bags!

You are thinking "Oh yeah TB handbags are what GIRLZ put stuff in. We can't put our sausage fingers in them and you hit us with them when we are N.A.U.G.H.T.Y". Yes we do. But also they are DEAD IMPORTANT in a way that only a fully trained WOMAN can comprehend. Just because the nearest you lot have got are hanging udder your eyeballs doesn't mean you can't learn. A proper HANDBAG says "I am SO IMPORTANT you may want to have a small cry" or "FUCK OFF WORLD" and also "POCKETS??? are you out of your tiny mind?! LOOK AT ME FOOL!"

As usual we start at the bottom and work our way up. Like casing someone out. The 'orrid underbelly of the Handbag world starts with THE KNOCK OFFZ.
I'm taking as read that as a woman we don't even NEED to look at BAD HANDBAGZ. It's impossible to have a VAGINA and carry a bad bag.

Exhibit a.
This is a Gucci knock off. How do I know? I JUST DO ok. These are THE ROOLZ ;
1. Yes ROCK A KNOCK OFF by all means. We've all done it.
2. Don't expect to get away with it.
3. SISTAZ will not say a word.
4. To YOUR FACE that is.


Now I'll get straight to and say HAIRY HANDBAGZ are in. I SWEAR if ANY of you snigger I will be very displeased and I will use my SPECIAL BAG for you…

Exhibit a. (i)
The nutsack.


Yes ladies. You saw it here first and I am SOOO for real. I'm serious. THE COUSIN IT BAG. HOT

GET IT RIGHT for Gawd's sake. THIS is wrong :

Exhibit b.
Looks like a goat. Smells like a goat. Because it is made of goats.


Now some PROPER LADIES will be like this :



and to understand the disbelief we need to slow it down to 2 x muvverinlawz per second to hear the VERY LARGE question mark at the end ;



I knooooow. It's a shocker.

While you are like TOTALLY FREAKING OUT let's have a quick look at Marc Jacobs and his friend Lorenzo on their way to the beach.


Now I am a HUGE fan of his work. And LOUIS VUITTON?? well CORRECT GIRLZ. Naturally. Did you have to bring your stuff from ASDA though love? At least you got Lorenzo to be your donkey though. NO WAY is Marc toting that shit! Thing that worries your reporter is why not use one of your own bags you cheapskate!? Handy on the beach tho

(Lorenzo is like "fuck it! I'm Batman. I don't care anymore).

NOW.

As we come to a close we get TO THE POINT. Vuitton? WERQING!!
At. All. Times.

No. I tell a lie. Actually these are popular :
Exhibit c.
I mean… is it just me or will this not make you look totally like Bernie Clifton's dog Schnorbitz? I mean I had to stop taking mine out cos the urge to SLING IT ROUND A MINGERZ NECK and bark at her was TOO STRONG.


I leave you with this. It's a must have I'm afraid. Mine is on order. You may weep now.

The bit about Marc Jacobs and Lorenzo had me in stitches.

can I go now?

I think each time that it can't possibly get any better, but every time it does.

2 x muvverinlawz per second was a particular highlight.

Magnifico

T.B wrote:can I go now?

I don't get to tell you what to do anymore after that

T.B wrote:
I mean… is it just me or will this not make you look totally like Bernie Clifton's dog Schnorbitz? I mean I had to stop taking mine out cos the urge to SLING IT ROUND A MINGERZ NECK and bark at her was TOO STRONG.

amazing werq

She is just the greatest.

I think each time that it can't possibly get any better, but every time it does.

Awe, GURL, awe!

its good enuff to go in any mag

my daughter thinks you are amazing

i doff my tricorn

Sherrers wrote:

T.B wrote:
I mean… is it just me or will this not make you look totally like Bernie Clifton's dog Schnorbitz? I mean I had to stop taking mine out cos the urge to SLING IT ROUND A MINGERZ NECK and bark at her was TOO STRONG.

amazing werq

belly laughs all around the office

scarlet pimpernel wrote:its good enuff to go in any mag

my daughter thinks you are amazing

better than

timmy helps you know

I do not!