Wookie's World of the Criminally Mundane

moisturiser mishap

Jnr DJ wrote:moisturiser mishap

I had a pervy dream involving Kelly Brook last night. I don't even like Kelly Brook

The fish shop back home in Stokesley won't serve solicitiors as greasy Trev the owner got stung in a divorce settlement years ago, he's even made the paper about this.

wookie wrote:The fish shop back home in Stokesley won't serve solicitiors as greasy Trev the owner got stung in a divorce settlement years ago, he's even made the paper about this.

thats not mundane.

He also wont serve Malcom (i cant remember his second name) who owned a local mill as he got done for Tax Fiddling

wookie wrote:He also wont serve Malcom (i cant remember his second name) who owned a local mill as he got done for Tax Fiddling

Malcolm Miller?

Good dullness

I have a meeting with a vicar shortly. I hope I dont say god or christ or jesus or fuck.

or "finger me slowly"

jon carter wrote:or "finger me slowly"

jon carter wrote:or "finger me slowly"

He didnt half laugh. His wife wasnt impressed mind.

nah she was hoping to be fingerbobbed fast

Sherrers wrote:nah she was hoping to be fingerbobbed fast

Filthy animal.

Shannon, the traveller girl, has left her job with us as she wants to be at home and bake.

Shannon's got the right idea if you ask me.

Fandango Widewheels wrote:Shannon's got the right idea if you ask me.

I asked her to bring some cakes in when she has baked.

We have a resident cake baker at work. She does a cracking lemon drizzle cake.

I took a glass of fresh orange to bed with me last night as I have a sore throat. I thought if I woke up coughing I could have a quick drink to soothe me.

I did in fact wake up coughing and had a little drink, it worked.

This is not the story though. When I woke up this morning there was the remains of a moth in the glass. Not all the remains, just some. It would appear that I drank some of the moth. I've never drunk/eaten moth before (I don't think).

you'll turn into a superhero that eats dressing gowns

I've started eating my chocolate bar before my crisps. Previously i had done it the other way round and you know what? It's been a revelation (Always a Wispa, though an assortment of flavours crisps wise_

I'm sat at a different desk today, the view goes further out of Leeds, but it means i can now see Armley so it's still not great.

One of the buttons fell off my coat this morning. I can't sew and it didn't look right, so i wore a different coat.

My shoes are now in such a state of disrepair that they have caused me to limp, the top of my right foot is in a world of pain.

I bought a magazine on Saturday, for the first time in ages. £4. Gutted. And no, it wasn't one of those specialist magazines i have previously been accussed of thumbing through.

Broadhead wrote:

My shoes are now in such a state of disrepair that they have caused me to limp, the top of my right foot is in a world of pain.

Cobblers!

Sherrers wrote:

Broadhead wrote:

My shoes are now in such a state of disrepair that they have caused me to limp, the top of my right foot is in a world of pain.

Cobblers!

Touche!

Broadhead wrote:

Sherrers wrote:

Broadhead wrote:

My shoes are now in such a state of disrepair that they have caused me to limp, the top of my right foot is in a world of pain.

Cobblers!

Touche!

oof wahey etcI know a little german... he's over there etc

Broadhead is so good at this.

I need to step up.

my housemate is cooking for his mail order girlfriend tomorrow, i hoping there will be left over Lasagne for tea tomorrow, that will be two meals that have been cooked for me this week, result.

Is this the same one with a face that is haunted?