FILM REVIEWS WITH DAVE CLARKE

Brilliant!


I have one of them...


One of my first jobs was an Usher at The Lounge Cinema in Leeds in the early 80s.

I can't remember the film (might have been 'name of the rose') but in those days you still had an Intermission.

It was the first time I had to take the Ice Cream tray down the front.

There is a little lectern just in front of the screen.

I had me tray and my instructions.

"Just go down the front a minute before the Intermission, put tray down. Serve"

I got there, put it down, film stops, lights come up and curtain closes.

I was stood too far back so these HUGE curtains whacked into me and I disappeared in front of a full house who despite the seriousness of the film and this being Leeds.. all pissed themselves laughing.

This being Leeds then every single bloke who came up to me in the queue was a variation of ;

"Two Mivvis, Choc-ice. Kiaora for the wife... bet you feel a right cunt don't you mate?"


I also fell down the trapdoor during a production of The Rocky Horror Show at Leeds Grand Theatre which is equally bad.

ACE!

I had to do a genuine Tommy Cooper/Eric Morcambe patented wrestle-with-the-curtains thing.

The worst bit was the moment on the floor behind the curtain with the all the laughing and realising I had to get out there.

There is simply no dignified way of doing that.

hahaha

Has that Dorian Grey film got anything to do with the book or is it like the League of extraordinary gents version?

Recipe for a raging clarkson from tim perhaps?

But I am asking about the book not the graphic novel BTW

MORE SENSE! LOOK OUT! SANDWICHES/DANCE FLOOR!

http://monkeykingdom.com

What the holy fuck has that got to do with anything you welsh div?

Rrriot Guurl wrote:What the holy fuck has that got to do with anything you welsh div?

As always telling it like it is RG...

shAdy wrote:

Rrriot Guurl wrote:What the holy fuck has that got to do with anything you welsh div?

As always telling it like it is RG...

Rrriot Guurl wrote:What the holy fuck has that got to do with anything you welsh div?

That is actually one of my favourite things posted on the net ever...

Angry Internet Lezzers.

Saying it so we don't have to

Al wrote:Angry Internet Lezzers.

Saying it so we don't have to

hahaha! that was the funniest post today

Jonny Boy wrote:Has that Dorian Grey film got anything to do with the book or is it like the League of extraordinary gents version?

Recipe for a raging clarkson from tim perhaps?

But I am asking about the book not the graphic novel BTW

It's Dorian Gray. ..with-an-ay!

ole'

It is reasonably faithful to the Oscar Wilde and what's his face?...boring... Mr Darcy. I forget hang on...


*googles*

...Colin Firth is actually quite convincing in it.


But for me the original Black and White film is loads better. The entire film is in monochrome and suddenly the last few seconds of the film when the painting is uncovered it all shifts to TECHNICOLOR and I still get a bit of chill thinking about it now, it fucking scared the shit out of me when I was a nipper I tell thee.

It's worth watching though Jonny.

Sherrers wrote:

Jonny Boy wrote:Has that Dorian Grey film got anything to do with the book or is it like the League of extraordinary gents version?

Recipe for a raging clarkson from tim perhaps?

But I am asking about the book not the graphic novel BTW

It's Dorian Gray. ..with-an-ay!

ole'

It is reasonably faithful to the Oscar Wilde and what's his face?...boring... Mr Darcy. I forget hang on...


*googles*

...Colin Firth is actually quite convincing in it.


But for me the original Black and White film is loads better. The entire film is in monochrome and suddenly the last few seconds of the film when the painting is uncovered it all shifts to TECHNICOLOR and I still get a bit of chill thinking about it now, it fucking scared the shit out of me when I was a nipper I tell thee.

It's worth watching though Jonny.

The wit astounds you more than me and back again! Jonny! FUCKING skin the BASTARDS! WHITE en out! LOL!

Son of Nod wrote:

shAdy wrote:

Rrriot Guurl wrote:What the holy fuck has that got to do with anything you welsh div?

As always telling it like it is RG...

TOTAL I agree! Total DIVIDEND me! And that make no fucking sense!

Watched Ground Hog Day again last night. Old film but brilliant.

Bishop wrote:

Watched Ground Hog Day again last night. Old film but brilliant.

Are you going to watch it again tonight?

Dont be silly. That would be daft.

bigdaddy wrote:

Bishop wrote:

Watched Ground Hog Day again last night. Old film but brilliant.

Are you going to watch it again tonight?

If you are going to buy a DVD lately you can do worse and get "The Box" .

I was expecting a load of shite. Something to do with being hyped by Blockbuster or something.

It is like proper golden era 1970s Sci Fi done proper for the first time. Probably it is based on a story from then.

I had a furrowed brow all the way through it and that doesn't happen often.

The sub plots which are always tossed off usually are as strong as the main theme of most films. I mean without giving anything away the romance bit or the supporting character arcs are all really well done.

It's like a movie length tales of the unexpected or such.

The director of Donnie Darko is a real talent to look out for. The direction is awesome. A word I don't use often sincerely.

I will be watching Yasujiro Ozu - Late Spring

"a remarkable , piecing film" Time Out

I imagine it will be a remarkable piece of engineering, with clarity! Can't wait!!!!! BUS in 15 and off the Chapter...

mmm...I will have to comeback to that one as I had to leave to room for 5 mins because my bank was giving me a head ache...Very old film and Has a hint of Wizard of Oz in it or would that be from it?

First time ever for me. Watched 'One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest' last night, great film!



Mmmmmm, Juicy Fruit.

It's a bit of a cliche but the book is like a gazillion times better than the film. It's all from Chief Bromden's perspective and quite a melon twister.

The film is a legend, but I can't recommend the book highly enough.


Ken Kesey. Loads of drugs in him with just enough room for one amazing book.

I didn't think Avatar would have quite the same impact on DVD with no 3D.

But it is still fucking ace.

I saw Paranormal Activity and had a moment to compare it to The Forth Kind.

I would say pound for pound P.A is scarier because it tries really hard to be. But it is both predictable and formulaic.

4th Kind is a much better film.

I wish someone had told me that before I spent 13 quid!




I reckon nothing will beat The Exorcist. It just can't be done.

I am happy in the knowledge that i will never, ever watch these scary films of which you speak.

Martyrs was the last one i watched and it will be the last i watch too. I watched that when the sun was out, god knows what i would be like if it was dark.

I can't get excited about Avatar. I'll watch it at some point though. The hype machine will get the better of me.

I wasn't a big fan of PA, I liked fourth kind, thought it had a more of a story and a bit more intrigue.

I watched drag me to hell recently. Was pretty good as comic book horrors go, typical Sam Raimi fare.

Broadhead wrote:I am happy in the knowledge that i will never, ever watch these scary films of which you speak.

+1. The Incredibles was about as suspenseful as I can take it.

Sherrers wrote:I saw Paranormal Activity and had a moment to compare it to The Forth Kind.

I would say pound for pound P.A is scarier because it tries really hard to be. But it is both predictable and formulaic.

4th Kind is a much better film.

I wish someone had told me that before I spent 13 quid!




I reckon nothing will beat The Exorcist. It just can't be done.

Broadhead wrote:I can't get excited about Avatar. I'll watch it at some point though. The hype machine will get the better of me.

yeah yeah I said that too, it will do you no good...