Larry Levan's Weekend Plans.

I got arrested for drink driving at 11pm. Was under the limit but cos they were so busy with teen nitwits self harming, dirty protesting and generally acting exactly like apes I didn't get released til Sunday afternoon.

The amusement and novelty of being arrested really wears out after the about the 4th hour in a totally bare cell with no water and the officers so busy having human shit thrown at them and wrestling massive teenage squaddies to the floor every ten minutes that you don't have the heart to do anything but wait it out.

It's the constant screaming that really makes it hard to sleep. One was going at it so long by the morning he was croaking like a frog. But still still at it. It's the women that are the worst though. They go savage!

The desk sarge made me laugh twice. He referred to the moment when the screamers that fell asleep wake up and find themselves inside AND with a hangover.... the first screamer sets off the rest.. he went "ah... the dawn chorus".

He also went :
"the great thing about drugs is now they get to be fucking mental in our custody for much much longer. On the plus side we don't have to hardly wash any shitty bedding anymore as most of them never sleep..."

It was a long time (maybe 25 years or so) since any brush with the law and I have to say... seeing the difference is quite an eye opener. It was honestly like a nightmarish mental institution. In the old days you had moments where they would bring in a nutter but they always calmed down or fell asleep and the general atmosphere inside was pretty quiet mostly. It's just relentlessly mental now and apparently never lets up over a weekend.

Oooh dear Tim.

That does not sound like a pleasant weekend at all.

Did you get pulled on the saturday or sunday?

Friday: stayed in, safe in the knowledge that i would be getting shit-faced at my mates house the night after so i didn't mind.

Saturday: I worked until 12, then nearly had a fight in Wakefield with a bus driver. There was a bit of pushing and shoving but i was right and the idiot admitted it. Then my mate rang to say he was off out so i bought 8 cans, drank one, and fell asleep.

Sunday: Mowed the lawn. Had one can, fell asleep again.

It's like i am the re-incarnation of Keith Moon

Broadhead wrote:Friday: stayed in, safe in the knowledge that i would be getting shit-faced at my mates house the night after so i didn't mind.

Saturday: I worked until 12, then nearly had a fight in Wakefield with a bus driver. There was a bit of pushing and shoving but i was right and the idiot admitted it. Then my mate rang to say he was off out so i bought 8 cans, drank one, and fell asleep.

Sunday: Mowed the lawn. Had one can, fell asleep again.

It's like i am the re-incarnation of Keith Moon

I mowed the lawn for the first time ever on Sunday morning. It broke my heart, it felt like the end of my childhood.

MarkD77 wrote:

Broadhead wrote:Friday: stayed in, safe in the knowledge that i would be getting shit-faced at my mates house the night after so i didn't mind.

Saturday: I worked until 12, then nearly had a fight in Wakefield with a bus driver. There was a bit of pushing and shoving but i was right and the idiot admitted it. Then my mate rang to say he was off out so i bought 8 cans, drank one, and fell asleep.

Sunday: Mowed the lawn. Had one can, fell asleep again.

It's like i am the re-incarnation of Keith Moon

I mowed the lawn for the first time ever on Sunday morning. It broke my heart, it felt like the end of my childhood.

A mate comes and mows mine for 2 pints of real ale.

Bishop wrote:

MarkD77 wrote:

Broadhead wrote:Friday: stayed in, safe in the knowledge that i would be getting shit-faced at my mates house the night after so i didn't mind.

Saturday: I worked until 12, then nearly had a fight in Wakefield with a bus driver. There was a bit of pushing and shoving but i was right and the idiot admitted it. Then my mate rang to say he was off out so i bought 8 cans, drank one, and fell asleep.

Sunday: Mowed the lawn. Had one can, fell asleep again.

It's like i am the re-incarnation of Keith Moon

I mowed the lawn for the first time ever on Sunday morning. It broke my heart, it felt like the end of my childhood.

A mate comes and mows mine for 2 pints of real ale.

Bargain! It's even an excuse to go to the boozer to make payment.

It is, which is why i have to call in on my way home from work tonight. Mind you i say on my way home, its actually straight opposite my house, so i go home first then go to the pub. Just thought id clear that up.

Bishop wrote:It is, which is why i have to call in on my way home from work tonight. Mind you i say on my way home, its actually straight opposite my house, so i go home first then go to the pub. Just thought id clear that up.

Sometimes I hate you, but only for a second

MarkD77 wrote:

Bishop wrote:It is, which is why i have to call in on my way home from work tonight. Mind you i say on my way home, its actually straight opposite my house, so i go home first then go to the pub. Just thought id clear that up.

Sometimes I hate you, but only for a second

Its a tough job, but someone has to do it.

No one would mow this lawn for a couple of pints. It's massive, almost half an acre. To make matters worse it's really mossy and the top garden is developing in to a bit of a bog.

It took me nearly 2 hours. Fortunately i had nothing better to do so i didn't mind too much.

Broadhead wrote:No one would mow this lawn for a couple of pints. It's massive, almost half an acre. To make matters worse it's really mossy and the top garden is developing in to a bit of a bog.

It took me nearly 2 hours. Fortunately i had nothing better to do so i didn't mind too much.

I found mine to be really patchy once I'd finished mowing so a quick trip down to B&Q was in order for a lawn repair kit. Looking forward to seeing if it works!

I'm loving how the the lads in their 30's here are steering towards the pensioners with their gardening chat.

Sherrers wrote:I got arrested for drink driving at 11pm. Was under the limit but cos they were so busy with teen nitwits self harming, dirty protesting and generally acting exactly like apes I didn't get released til Sunday afternoon.

The amusement and novelty of being arrested really wears out after the about the 4th hour in a totally bare cell with no water and the officers so busy having human shit thrown at them and wrestling massive teenage squaddies to the floor every ten minutes that you don't have the heart to do anything but wait it out.

It's the constant screaming that really makes it hard to sleep. One was going at it so long by the morning he was croaking like a frog. But still still at it. It's the women that are the worst though. They go savage!

The desk sarge made me laugh twice. He referred to the moment when the screamers that fell asleep wake up and find themselves inside AND with a hangover.... the first screamer sets off the rest.. he went "ah... the dawn chorus".

He also went :
"the great thing about drugs is now they get to be fucking mental in our custody for much much longer. On the plus side
we don't have to hardly wash any shitty bedding anymore as most of them never sleep..."

It was a long time (maybe 25 years or so) since any brush with the law and I have to say... seeing the difference is quite an eye opener. It was honestly like a nightmarish mental institution. In the old days you had moments where they would bring in a nutter but they always calmed down or fell asleep and the general atmosphere inside was pretty quiet mostly. It's just relentlessly mental now and apparently never lets up over a weekend.

Holy Shit!

Token Bird wrote:I'm loving how the the lads in their 30's here are steering towards the pensioners with their gardening chat.

Next weekend: Hanging baskets and climbers.

Token Bird wrote:I'm loving how the the lads in their 30's here are steering towards the pensioners with their gardening chat.

Where is Rog?

Wideface why were you fighting with blakey?

Thats bad news tim.

It wasn't my fault, but i reacted in a childish way that surprised even me.

There are some road works near where i work so it's a bit chaotic. He had pulled over to let people on and off and right when i was at the side of him he pulled out. I managed to get passed him and just missed the roadworks ahead. Then he started honking his horn loads and flashing me. He proceeded to drive really close to me and trying to intimidate me. He didn't.

I was so happy when the lights changed to red up ahead before we got through them. I got out and walked to his door, which he opened. I asked if he was blind and what his problem was. He got out and asked what my problem was and pushed me. I laughed at first and told him to calm down then he pushed me again, at which point i lost my rag a bit and called him a rude word and pushed him back. I explained he shouldn't have pulled out and pointed at the roadworks etc and said if i had crashed it would have been his fault and i had at least 20 witnesses, all sat on his bus. He agreed and held his hand out to shake mine. I told him not to push it and got back in my car.

The lights had since gone green and others behind were getting annoyed.

I had the last laugh though. I sat at the lights pretending to put my seat belt back on and stuff until they went from green to amber, then i slowly drove off, leaving him stuck at the lights.

It's one of the most childish things ive ever done and i am very embabrrassed about it. He was lucky i hate fighting so much or i would have headbutted him.

Ah mate. Im impressed with your self control. I hate bad drivers and I especially hate bad drivers who them blame everyone else.

Oh and im more than impressed with you leaving him at the lights. Brilliant.

I sniggered like Mutley as i drove off.

so what delights hve we planned this weekend?

Me, I am working tomorrow morning. Im turning into wideface. Then, bugger all. I may sit in the garden all weekend and drink beer and shout at people who happen to come near the house.

tonight - no plans

tomorrow - go to horsforth, to see a friend, then go home

sunday - no plans


wooooohoooooo

I will be at Detached tonight, my mate Tom's playing which will be nice, I'll also get to witness first hand Broadheads Red Stripe onslaught. Cant wait!
Probably crack on all Saturday and then die Sunday, got Monday booked off though so who knows!

What time you getting down Jim?

I am doing half 1 'til 3, then Sims is on in the warehouse straight after.

I cannae wait!

Broadhead wrote:What time you getting down Jim?

I am doing half 1 'til 3, then Sims is on in the warehouse straight after.

I cannae wait!

he's the one that had that big hissy fit rant a couple of years ago isnt it?

Aye, i think so. He was right too from what i remember?

not sure what time going down Scott, my mate Tom is playing at 11 so probably about 10.30-45?

Nice one, i'll see you there.

I might be off to a BBQ tomorrow if the weather holds up, though that certainly goes against my diet so will have to take my own Cress to eat. On Ryvita, of course.

its quite tempting to see broadhead in a red stripe mischief

I'm like a little freak show, hired in to entertain the waifs and strays. Wind me up and watch me go.........for a fag mid-set.

witness the mighty division of ages on the forum.

pensioners : totally silent/staying in before next weeks holiday

young turks : out from friday to monday and probably next week too