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VVWI

veryverywrongindeed recordings


+16
crang
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Fandango Widewheels
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RvZ
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20 posters

    THE BISHOP'S WEEKLY PARISH BULLETIN (inc. Turnip's wives)

    RvZ
    RvZ
    vvvwi


    Number of posts : 2685
    Location : Londinium

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    Post  RvZ Thu Apr 19, 2012 12:53 am

    Bishop wrote: I am still compiling data

    ah

    the warmest and oldest of chestnuts Very Happy
    Bishop
    Bishop
    vvwi


    Number of posts : 4488
    Location : Blyth (nr doncatraz).

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    Post  Bishop Thu Apr 19, 2012 12:54 am

    RvZ wrote:
    Bishop wrote: I am still compiling data

    ah

    the warmest and oldest of chestnuts Very Happy

    Laughing Laughing Laughing Laughing used so often in my everyday work.
    RvZ
    RvZ
    vvvwi


    Number of posts : 2685
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    Post  RvZ Thu Apr 19, 2012 12:55 am

    ...and mine.
    Bishop
    Bishop
    vvwi


    Number of posts : 4488
    Location : Blyth (nr doncatraz).

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    Post  Bishop Thu Apr 19, 2012 12:56 am

    RvZ wrote:...and mine.



    I also like, leave it with me and I will come back to you. Never get tied down to a timescale for said return call though.
    Fandango Widewheels
    Fandango Widewheels
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    Post  Fandango Widewheels Thu Apr 19, 2012 8:01 pm

    Blyth, officially the most boring parish in the world Wink
    Bishop
    Bishop
    vvwi


    Number of posts : 4488
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    Post  Bishop Thu Apr 19, 2012 8:04 pm

    Fandango Widewheels wrote:Blyth, officially the most boring parish in the world Wink

    Ok, ok. I was drinking booze and didnt get round to it. My last report was a week today therefore I have until tonight to get it sorted. Very Happy
    Sherrers
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    Post  Sherrers Thu Apr 19, 2012 8:11 pm

    Bloody work-to-trule anarchist.

    Go back to Ted Heath's Britain you bloody Scargill.

    Wink
    T.B
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    Post  T.B Thu Apr 19, 2012 8:13 pm

    I'd be embarrassed if my thread was still on training wheels
    Bishop
    Bishop
    vvwi


    Number of posts : 4488
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    Post  Bishop Thu Apr 19, 2012 11:54 pm

    So its that time of week again you impatient old farts.

    Running has been no existent this week. I am angry and upset with myself. I did however manage 2 hours on the wooden horse and played 2 games on Sunday, which salvaged at least some of my lost fitness.

    Friday saw a party for Adam held at the Red hart. It was well attended and ended in the usual drunken mayhem.

    Adam

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    I will introduce a few characters here, this is Wilson and Myself behind the bar. I had commandeered Emma’s crutches by this point and several people, some of whom I didn’t know, were on the receiving end of a good whack on the head.

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    THE BISHOP'S WEEKLY PARISH BULLETIN (inc. Turnip's wives) - Page 3 Th_photo-4

    Wilson lives in Nottingham, has 4 kids, is married and loves humping Mad Eye whenever he gets chance. He also loves playing golf from his front lawn late at night, whilst drinking brandy. We usually aim for the 30 sign down the road but have never hit it.

    Emma is married to Jono. They live in Styrrup and used to own the White Swan until it closed down. She currently has a broken foot, from falling off a bike stand at college. She studies Art and is very good. She has droopy boobs.

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    I don’t remember getting home, I don’t think.

    Saturday saw Karly Coldturd host her first BBQ. She normally just attends other peoples. Karly is the local stalker. I have had to call the police about her on many occasions when I have found her in my garden. Karly has 4 Schnoozers and likes grooming.

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    Mr Coldturd (her dad) borrowed my gazebo for the event and purchased a new BBQ.

    The attendees for the BBQ were in no particular order. Mylelf, Gem, Raggy, Dinger, Metfuck, Mad Eye, Bettlejuice, Izzy, Baby Evie, John from Next door, Sarah, Sarahs mum, and Pork Chop.

    Pork Chop had been out drinking for most of the day and was in abit of a pickle. He cant drink and I am still lost as to why he thinks he can. Claire his other half did not attend as she was too pissed and decided not to make a tit of herself and turn up, unlike Porky.

    We ate, we drank and we were merry, Metfuck fell over and Raggy couldn’t speak.

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    Metfuck took Raggy home and put him to bed,

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    after he made him do rude things

    THE BISHOP'S WEEKLY PARISH BULLETIN (inc. Turnip's wives) - Page 3 Photo



    Raggy was a sex past with Frankie who wasn’t at the BBQ but had been out the night before.



    THE BISHOP'S WEEKLY PARISH BULLETIN (inc. Turnip's wives) - Page 3 Photo-2

    Raggy lives with Dinger and they are like husband and brother. See previous Eastern European picture. They are due to have a boxing match shortly in the Red Hart car park.

    Mad Eye has now gone on holiday on her own, as she needed some rest from working. She left Betteljuice and the kids at home.



    Pete next door has put his house up for rent.

    The automatic door at the shop is causing confusion in the village. Sometimes it works, sometimes it doesnt.

    Olive oil has been sacked from the Swan as has the Eastern European chap (no relation to Rag or Dinger)

    Robopimp continues to update facebook about how he has cleaned his Trombone and is now watching WWF or WWE and wonders why he is still single at 32.

    Flanny drank 2 pints on Monday and was drunk.

    Tom is back in the village this weekend as his mum and dad who have been away for 6 weeks.
    RvZ
    RvZ
    vvvwi


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    Post  RvZ Fri Apr 20, 2012 1:01 am

    is Adam (gold shorts, stomach held in) the Gay-in-denial?

    I can't help but equate 'Wilson' with Ray Liotta somewhat. A Ray Liotta a bit out of place in a rural pub.
    Bishop
    Bishop
    vvwi


    Number of posts : 4488
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    Post  Bishop Fri Apr 20, 2012 1:08 am

    RvZ wrote:is Adam (gold shorts, stomach held in) the Gay-in-denial?

    I can't help but equate 'Wilson' with Ray Liotta somewhat. A Ray Liotta a bit out of place in a rural pub.



    Yes.



    Yep Wilson is very much a non rural person, although he did live in Blyth for a while. His wife once ran round the pool table in the bar with her boobs out.
    Sherrers
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    Post  Sherrers Fri Apr 20, 2012 1:18 am

    Laughing Laughing Laughing Laughing
    T.B
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    Post  T.B Fri Apr 20, 2012 2:32 am

    Coldturd.

    COLDTURD??

    We have a new ace in the pack.

    The hugeness and randomness of the photos put me off for a bit but once I clocked it was a series of events over the weekend it made glorious sense.

    If sense is the right word.

    Worth waiting for?

    Yeeeeaaah.

    Very Happy
    T.B
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    Post  T.B Fri Apr 20, 2012 2:34 am

    what is 'the wooden horse' mr wiKKA WIKKA MAN? Shocked
    Bishop
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    Post  Bishop Fri Apr 20, 2012 3:34 am

    T.B wrote:what is 'the wooden horse' mr wiKKA WIKKA MAN? Shocked



    This is her. I only fell off twice.

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    Sherrers
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    Post  Sherrers Fri Apr 20, 2012 3:39 am

    the phrase 'the clue is the name' has never been more valid.
    Bishop
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    Post  Bishop Fri Apr 20, 2012 3:40 am

    Sherrers wrote:the phrase 'the clue is the name' has never been more valid.

    Laughing Laughing Laughing Laughing Laughing
    Sherrers
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    Post  Sherrers Fri Apr 20, 2012 3:42 am

    to be fair to TB it does sound a bit like something you get sentenced to by the inquisition.
    Bishop
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    Post  Bishop Fri Apr 20, 2012 3:43 am

    Sherrers wrote:to be fair to TB it does sound a bit like something you get sentenced to by the inquisition.



    I sentence you to 2 hard years on "the wooden horse" naked. Take him away.Laughing
    Sherrers
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    Post  Sherrers Fri Apr 20, 2012 3:48 am

    i confess fully in advance
    Fandango Widewheels
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    Post  Fandango Widewheels Fri Apr 20, 2012 4:22 am

    Bishop wrote:
    Sherrers wrote:to be fair to TB it does sound a bit like something you get sentenced to by the inquisition.



    I sentence you to 2 hard years on "the wooden horse" naked. Take him away.Laughing

    It's always 'naked' with you, filthbag.
    Sherrers
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    Post  Sherrers Fri Apr 20, 2012 4:32 am

    Bishop wrote:
    T.B wrote:what is 'the wooden horse' mr wiKKA WIKKA MAN? Shocked



    This is her. I only fell off twice.

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    I don't envy the poor sod who has to sit in that chair. Don't they get whacked a lot?
    Bishop
    Bishop
    vvwi


    Number of posts : 4488
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    Post  Bishop Fri Apr 20, 2012 6:42 pm

    Sherrers wrote:
    Bishop wrote:
    T.B wrote:what is 'the wooden horse' mr wiKKA WIKKA MAN? Shocked



    This is her. I only fell off twice.

    THE BISHOP'S WEEKLY PARISH BULLETIN (inc. Turnip's wives) - Page 3 561130_10150648192043994_696698993_9248871_69779451_n

    I don't envy the poor sod who has to sit in that chair. Don't they get whacked a lot?

    Yes, but it does them good, according to the inquisition. Very Happy
    bigdaddy
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    Post  bigdaddy Fri Apr 20, 2012 7:10 pm

    RvZ wrote:is Adam (gold shorts, stomach held in) the Gay-in-denial?

    The shorts, I feel, are a clue.
    RvZ
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    Post  RvZ Fri Apr 20, 2012 8:16 pm

    I'm enjoying the wooden horse immensely!
    Bishop
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    Post  Bishop Fri Apr 20, 2012 8:18 pm

    RvZ wrote:I'm enjoying the wooden horse immensely!



    Then you are not doing it right. Very Happy
    RvZ
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    Post  RvZ Fri Apr 20, 2012 8:21 pm

    Filthy Wooden Animal.
    Bishop
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    Post  Bishop Fri Apr 20, 2012 8:25 pm

    RvZ wrote:Filthy Wooden Animal.

    Laughing Laughing Laughing Laughing Laughing

    Dinger, one of the Eastern Europeans, once asked why the grey horse over there wasnt moving very much. When we confirmed its wood like state he was still not convinced it wasnt real becase he had seen its tail move. That will be the wind, you pleb.
    Sherrers
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    Post  Sherrers Fri Apr 20, 2012 8:28 pm

    He'd be really easy to fool if you hunted him.

    Get some mannequins as decoys. POW. Stick his head above the fireplace.
    Bishop
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    Post  Bishop Fri Apr 20, 2012 10:13 pm

    Laughing Laughing Laughing Laughing Laughing Laughing

    I went straight to the pub from work yesterday, I did not pass "Go" and i did not collect £200.00. Mrs Bishop was working so I had to go and see her.



    Chip Pan Anne who has mucky feet was in.



    Claire and Steve are not now getting married at Gringley on the Hill, they are getting married somewhere else.



    I put 50p in the pool table and the balls didnt come out. I complained, but was not refunded.



    The Fourways are having a new menu on April 27th.

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