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    Frankie Knuckles' Gardening Tips

    Sherrers
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    Post  Sherrers on Wed Jun 02, 2010 4:18 am

    Al wrote:ah the joy of gardening today!!

    there is something strangely soothing about just digging.

    especially after weeks of changing Paxman's underpants etc etc

    now... what am I going to do with this mountain of weeds that have accumulated in the last year? Embarassed Embarassed Embarassed Embarassed

    Don't say I have to tell you? You will be black balled from our virtual chelsea flower show if I have to tell you No

    The answer is not 'put it in the green bag for the council' either....
    Son of Nod
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    Post  Son of Nod on Fri Jun 04, 2010 12:14 am

    I did read somewhere, that plants do like a bit of Viagra...?? Shocked
    RvZ
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    Post  RvZ on Fri Jun 04, 2010 10:31 pm

    Sherrers wrote:
    Al wrote:ah the joy of gardening today!!

    there is something strangely soothing about just digging.

    especially after weeks of changing Paxman's underpants etc etc

    now... what am I going to do with this mountain of weeds that have accumulated in the last year? Embarassed Embarassed Embarassed Embarassed

    Don't say I have to tell you? You will be black balled from our virtual chelsea flower show if I have to tell you No

    The answer is not 'put it in the green bag for the council' either....

    Yes you have to tell me! it's making my garden and by proxy my reputation look very untidy.
    Broadhead
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    Post  Broadhead on Fri Jun 04, 2010 10:38 pm

    I bet your scruffy garden is the talk of the Post Office queue Al.

    'Well if thats what his garden is like can you imagine what it's like inside the house?'

    They will also be questioning your personal hygiene and saying you have tagnuts.
    RvZ
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    Post  RvZ on Fri Jun 04, 2010 10:44 pm

    I know. I may never be invited to play bridge again!
    Broadhead
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    Post  Broadhead on Fri Jun 04, 2010 10:47 pm

    Laughing
    Bishop
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    Post  Bishop on Fri Jun 04, 2010 11:16 pm

    Broadhead wrote:I bet your scruffy garden is the talk of the Post Office queue Al.

    'Well if thats what his garden is like can you imagine what it's like inside the house?'

    They will also be questioning your personal hygiene and saying you have tagnuts.

    Laughing Laughing Dangleberrys.

    Sorry Embarassed Embarassed
    Broadhead
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    Post  Broadhead on Fri Jun 04, 2010 11:21 pm

    See also:

    Whinnets, or my own personal favourite, arse biscuits.
    Sherrers
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    Post  Sherrers on Fri Jun 04, 2010 11:32 pm

    Al wrote:
    Sherrers wrote:
    Al wrote:ah the joy of gardening today!!

    there is something strangely soothing about just digging.

    especially after weeks of changing Paxman's underpants etc etc

    now... what am I going to do with this mountain of weeds that have accumulated in the last year? Embarassed Embarassed Embarassed Embarassed

    Don't say I have to tell you? You will be black balled from our virtual chelsea flower show if I have to tell you No

    The answer is not 'put it in the green bag for the council' either....

    Yes you have to tell me! it's making my garden and by proxy my reputation look very untidy.




    The Septics call it 'Mulching'. We call it Compost. Get to work you idle taxpayer bothering license-fee spunking goon!
    RvZ
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    Post  RvZ on Fri Jun 04, 2010 11:41 pm

    But you can't put weeds back in the ground they will just grow back!
    wookie
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    Post  wookie on Fri Jun 04, 2010 11:48 pm

    Broadhead wrote:See also:

    Whinnets, or my own personal favourite, arse biscuits.

    we called them

    clingons or clinkers
    Broadhead
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    Post  Broadhead on Fri Jun 04, 2010 11:53 pm

    i used to call a scruffy kid at work General Von Clinker.
    Rrriot Guurl
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    Post  Rrriot Guurl on Fri Jun 04, 2010 11:54 pm

    Broadhead wrote:i used to call a scruffy kid at work General Von Clinker.

    Laughing Laughing

    schoolyard rules
    RvZ
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    Post  RvZ on Wed Jun 23, 2010 9:45 pm

    oh the simple joy of the british garden in full summer splendor

    later to be strimmed to bits when our shit footballers ruin my life


    ahhhhh


    sunny
    Ye Olde Rog
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    Post  Ye Olde Rog on Wed Jun 23, 2010 9:52 pm

    funnily enough I got rid of all the french cunts from my lawn

    how gardens imitate life!

    lovely


    ahhhh

    sunny sunny
    Broadhead
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    Post  Broadhead on Wed Jun 23, 2010 9:53 pm

    I can just see Al later, naming individual dandelions after the England squad and angrily chopping their heads off as he says their name through gritted teeth.

    Ye Olde Rog
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    Post  Ye Olde Rog on Wed Jun 23, 2010 10:06 pm

    agent orange works a treat on the french bastards
    Sherrers
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    Post  Sherrers on Sun Jun 27, 2010 12:02 am

    I wish I could put up photos.

    My roses are having it.


    sunny
    Bishop
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    Post  Bishop on Sun Jun 27, 2010 11:34 pm

    Sherrers wrote:I wish I could put up photos.

    My roses are having it.


    sunny

    Laughing Laughing Laughing Laughing

    The animals.
    Sherrers
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    Post  Sherrers on Mon Jun 28, 2010 9:25 pm

    boo.

    gardening newsflash

    much needed and overdue rain smashing for plants, also smashed all the flower petals off.


    communication ends


    Sad
    Bishop
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    Post  Bishop on Mon Jun 28, 2010 9:26 pm

    Sherrers wrote:boo.

    gardening newsflash

    much needed and overdue rain smashing for plants, also smashed all the flower petals off.


    communication ends


    Sad

    Sad times.
    Ye Olde Rog
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    Post  Ye Olde Rog on Sat Jul 10, 2010 9:01 am

    Sherrers wrote:boo.

    gardening newsflash

    much needed and overdue rain smashing for plants, also smashed all the flower petals off.


    communication ends


    Sad


    Right gird your loins, comb your wife and hold your breath.

    I'm going to pay The Ego a compliment. Not just any compliment. A gardener's big up if you will.

    I am jealous of his garden.

    There. I said it.

    He's still a wanker though.
    Bishop
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    Post  Bishop on Sun Jul 11, 2010 8:07 pm

    Roger in compliment shocker.

    Recovers well with his last statement though.

    Laughing Laughing Laughing
    RvZ
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    Post  RvZ on Mon Jul 12, 2010 10:25 pm

    I too have heard that the 'gardening leave' is doing wonders up north
    Sherrers
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    Post  Sherrers on Tue Jul 13, 2010 4:36 am

    Ta chaps!

    I fucked it all up today though. Tried to kill my hangover with some extreme weeding.

    Bit like when you shave a bit off the bottom of a chair leg to make it more stable and end up with 4 stumps... made a real mess of things today, then it rained so I had to leave all the shit everywhere.

    Massive gardening error! Embarassed Embarassed
    Sherrers
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    Post  Sherrers on Wed Jul 21, 2010 2:28 am

    Two torrential (and I never use that word) i say TORRENTIAL downpours just killed my roses.

    Not bruised, not knocked a few petals off... hammered them til there was nothing left.


    Crying or Very sad Sad
    Bishop
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    Post  Bishop on Thu Jul 22, 2010 4:31 am

    Weather vandalism. Its the worst kind.

    I have no flowers in my garden. My Tulips appear to have been dug up. I will find the fucker that did that and plant them in my garden.
    RvZ
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    Post  RvZ on Mon Aug 09, 2010 10:54 pm

    tut

    you go away and the mess you come back to in the garden,.,.
    Sherrers
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    Post  Sherrers on Sun Aug 15, 2010 8:43 pm

    The nitrate has made the lawn so GREEN it makes your eyes hurt.

    I forgot about edging. Spent all day yesterday trimming the edges and where it meets stone using big scissors. It was the missing X factor.

    That and washing the stones flags and gravel.

    Some Zen-like raking of the paths was also involved.

    My lovely hands are ruined.

    I'm a very happy gardener today. sunny
    Fandango Widewheels
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    Post  Fandango Widewheels on Mon Aug 16, 2010 6:11 pm

    I have a serious weed and bald patch situation. Attemptied to remedy both this weekend so fingers crossed.

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