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    Frankie Knuckles' Gardening Tips

    T.B
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    Post  T.B on Wed May 19, 2010 6:20 am

    I know you pensioners love a potter in the allotment.


    My Dad has a big lawn and wants tips on getting that perfect stripe and condition.
    RvZ
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    Post  RvZ on Wed May 19, 2010 6:27 am

    YES!

    finally.


    sunny
    Son of Nod
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    Post  Son of Nod on Wed May 19, 2010 6:59 pm

    T.B
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    Post  T.B on Wed May 19, 2010 9:20 pm

    oh dear that looks awfully complicated!
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    Post  Son of Nod on Wed May 19, 2010 9:34 pm

    Token Bird wrote:oh dear that looks awfully complicated!

    Laughing Laughing Laughing

    I know! My thoughts too!!
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    Post  wookie on Wed May 19, 2010 9:42 pm

    how about painting stripes on it?
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    Post  Son of Nod on Wed May 19, 2010 9:50 pm

    wookie wrote:how about painting stripes on it?

    Laughing Laughing Laughing

    This is better...

    http://www.eurocosm.com/Application/Products/Atco-cylinder-mowers/lawn-care-GB.asp
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    Post  Son of Nod on Wed May 19, 2010 9:53 pm

    Has your Dad got one of these?

    Frankie Knuckles' Gardening Tips Atco-Balmoral-md1
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    Post  RvZ on Wed May 19, 2010 10:37 pm

    It's nonsense!

    My gardener's soul is appalled!

    All you need is a sit down mower and a steady hand.

    It's just the grass being mowed one way and then the other is all.....
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    Post  T.B on Wed May 19, 2010 10:38 pm

    I can see this thread causing some agg in the day room...

    (I told you I'd kick this place in the arse)

    Very Happy
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    Post  Son of Nod on Wed May 19, 2010 10:42 pm

    To be honest I have not got a clue, google it and see...our back garden needs an SOS....over grown, wild...just wild. I want to get rid by Mrs Nod won't. I want a nice water feature, pond with frogs etc, with garden beds.
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    Post  wookie on Wed May 19, 2010 11:01 pm

    Son of Nod wrote:To be honest I have not got a clue, google it and see...our back garden needs an SOS....over grown, wild...just wild. I want to get rid by Mrs Nod won't. I want a nice water feature, pond with frogs etc, with garden beds.

    you will need

    some nepalm
    a shovel
    a hose

    how to do it

    nepalm the garden, so its cleared
    dig hole in earth with shovel
    fill it with water from the hose
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    Post  Son of Nod on Wed May 19, 2010 11:19 pm

    wookie wrote:
    Son of Nod wrote:To be honest I have not got a clue, google it and see...our back garden needs an SOS....over grown, wild...just wild. I want to get rid by Mrs Nod won't. I want a nice water feature, pond with frogs etc, with garden beds.

    you will need

    some nepalm
    a shovel
    a hose

    how to do it

    nepalm the garden, so its cleared
    dig hole in earth with shovel
    fill it with water from the hose

    Frankie Knuckles' Gardening Tips 1178434976ljJ0hW

    The neighbours will love that....cakes! Very Happy
    Sherrers
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    Post  Sherrers on Thu May 20, 2010 11:44 pm

    Al wrote:All you need is a sit down mower and a steady hand.

    It's just the grass being mowed one way and then the other is all.....

    All you need is a lawn! yours is about 8ft by 4 you nutter.

    It's not just mowing one way then the other you southern fool Very Happy
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    Post  Ye Olde Rog on Thu May 20, 2010 11:47 pm

    You amateurs know nothing.

    Your lawn is infested with dandelions Sheridan!
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    Post  Son of Nod on Thu May 20, 2010 11:51 pm

    Ye Olde Rog wrote:You amateurs know nothing.

    Your lawn is infested with dandelions Sheridan!

    They make you wee in bed, so I heard....
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    Post  Sherrers on Fri May 21, 2010 12:09 am

    Ye Olde Rog wrote:You amateurs know nothing.

    Your lawn is infested with dandelions Sheridan!

    Poppycock. Yours is barely bigger than Al's!

    You could cut yours with a whisk tied to a turtle.
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    Post  T.B on Fri May 21, 2010 12:10 am

    There's a lawn-off going down.

    call the cops.
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    Post  wookie on Fri May 21, 2010 12:15 am

    a drive by strimming
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    Post  RvZ on Fri May 21, 2010 12:15 am

    You two manual mowers know NOTHING!

    *drives off really very slowly*
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    Post  Sherrers on Fri May 21, 2010 3:22 am

    You need a chalk line (very long).

    A lawnmower (not a flymo, needs a roller).

    A heavy roller.

    A lawn.


    Use the chalkline to make 2 lines like a train track in the middle of the lawm. A pro trick is to foreshorten the line of sight slightly on larger lawns to create an illusion of distance. If the lawn is very large then you have to use foreshortening as a straight line will distort over distance into a slight curve.

    Mow one way alternating lines the width of the mower.

    Mow the other in the opposite direction.

    Use the heavy roller for finish.

    For best effects do it 3 days in a row using shorter and shorter blade heights. Water on day 2.



    Then bin your daft sit down mower or get a proper lawn

    Very Happy
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    Post  Son of Nod on Fri May 21, 2010 5:46 am

    Sherrers wrote:You need a chalk line (very long).

    A lawnmower (not a flymo, needs a roller).

    A heavy roller.

    A lawn.


    Use the chalkline to make 2 lines like a train track in the middle of the lawm. A pro trick is to foreshorten the line of sight slightly on larger lawns to create an illusion of distance. If the lawn is very large then you have to use foreshortening as a straight line will distort over distance into a slight curve.

    Mow one way alternating lines the width of the mower.

    Mow the other in the opposite direction.

    Use the heavy roller for finish.

    For best effects do it 3 days in a row using shorter and shorter blade heights. Water on day 2.



    Then bin your daft sit down mower or get a proper lawn

    Very Happy

    very very important this part....
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    Post  T.B on Fri May 21, 2010 10:58 pm

    I think he is hinting that Al and Rog's are too small to qualify.
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    Post  scarlet pimpernel on Fri May 21, 2010 11:43 pm

    i get this on mine any tips

    Frankie Knuckles' Gardening Tips Weeds_10
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    Post  Sherrers on Fri May 21, 2010 11:48 pm

    creeping buttecup i think it is called

    if you have a weed infested lawn you need to scar it (a sort of roller of spikes) and put down nitrates to kill it.

    weeds are a big job. a really weedy lawn needs a lot of work to get it back into shape
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    Post  T.B on Fri May 21, 2010 11:49 pm

    it's quite pretty though!

    i think it's a boy thing isn't it? lawn control and ethinc weed cleansing Wink
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    Post  Sherrers on Fri May 21, 2010 11:52 pm

    I'm not a lawn nazi.

    In roger's case (all dandelions are french) then yes!
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    Post  Ye Olde Rog on Sat May 22, 2010 12:02 am

    Yellow faced french cunts.
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    Post  RvZ on Sun May 30, 2010 12:18 am

    ah the joy of gardening today!!

    there is something strangely soothing about just digging.

    especially after weeks of changing Paxman's underpants etc etc

    now... what am I going to do with this mountain of weeds that have accumulated in the last year? Embarassed Embarassed Embarassed Embarassed
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    Post  Seeley on Tue Jun 01, 2010 2:07 am

    Ye Olde Rog wrote:Yellow faced french cunts.

    Laughing Laughing Laughing Laughing

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